"why do I have to be so sad"

      

I feel like I’m upside down—smiling, pretending to be happy just to avoid questions. I already feel sad, and on top of that, there are people around me doing random, annoying things as if they need attention—when I’m not even in the mood to talk to anyone. It’s not that I want them to understand me; I just want some quiet time for myself.

But have you ever felt like you’re constantly detaching yourself from everyone, not telling anyone that you’re having a bad day (just to avoid questions), yet a part of you still hopes that just one person would notice? That someone—just one person—would ask, “How are you? How are you feeling, emotionally?” And somehow, just hearing those words would make you feel okay, even if only for a moment.

a wound to remember

 Uhmmm, actually, this is the second time I’ve had a little accident. The last time, I hit my head and was literally bleeding—it felt like I had taken a headshot or something. And now, this. I just feel awful. I guess I still haven’t outgrown my childhood carelessness. huhuhu